Beauty in brokenness

In the midst of finals week I have come to a strange, yet thrilling discovery-

 I enjoy being in situations I can't handle.
okay maybe enjoy isn't the right word.

I have come to appreciate what those situations do with my walk with the Lord. 

DISCLAIMER
First, don't get me wrong, I am not saying I want a whole bunch of trials to flood my way, I'm just acknowledging the beauty of true dependence on the Lord.  
Some people might be able to see that all the time, and to you people I applaud you. Truly, I seek to be like that one day. Unfortunately, I am human and with that comes a lot of junk I'd rather not admit. 

I am a control freak. 
I like knowing everything
I can't handle letting go of situations. 

^That shines a great light on me, right? 

But it's the ugly truth so there it is.
In my everyday life I have a REALLY hard time letting Him take the wheel. Jesus actually becomes more like a backseat passenger, and some days I don't even want to let Him in the car.  

So you can see why situations where I get knocked on my butt are good for me. 
Jesus breaks us but in the most beautiful way.

Jesus does not break you as the world breaks you. He does it with love, compassion and gentleness.

whatever your stand is on "everything happens for a reason" is, i'm not here to argue it, the purpose of this was not to address that, but to address that I believe there are situations that the Lord allows in our life to make you truly depend on Him.


"We also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us." Romans 5:3-5 

"For His sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them all as rubbish in order that I may gain Christ." Philippians 3:8

Maybe some of y'all are like me, and you need situations that are hard in our life to see that gaining Christ is the only thing that matters. 
There have been times in my life where I truly believe He has ripped things away from me so that I could see Him, at the time it left me completely b r o k e n. 
But it was through that brokenness that I found how to fall in love with Him, instead of the world. 

So in the midst of trials there are only two choices really, and you get to decide..
Are you going to let the world break you or Jesus?

 ^"In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed." I Peter 1:6-7

The result of a finished trial is so much bigger than us.
As a follower of Christ you are His vessel, we must deny ourselves and follow Him through it all. 
In the present moment it is difficult to see what is going on, or why, but the closer you cling to Him, you will see that your desire to know why begins to fade away. 

Trust that His love for you is SO MUCH bigger than any trial, or issue you are facing.

Putting The Lord on the back burner

One of the craziest things to me is that we think we can handle this life on our own.
I am a victim of this and recently The Lord has shown me how much I need him. Not just that, but how much I need to spend time alone with Him.

Growing up in the church I have always been told "have your quiet time" but I never really understood what it meant. I wouldn't know how to just sit with The Lord. Now that I am older I understand what it means, but that doesn't stop the excuses. Instead of not understanding, I say I am too busy. So many things I have to "check off my list", so many things that have deadlines, that can't wait. 

"The Lord can wait right?"
"He's always here so what does it really matter if I spend time with Him right now?"
"I can do it later"
"He understands I have to get this stuff done."

Sound familiar?

Like everything I write, please know I am saying this to myself just as much, if not more. 

But we have GOT to stop putting things in front of the Lord. Even the good things. 
Even the things that we think can't wait.

I promise you that nothing is more important than spending time with God. 

Do you want to know how I know this?

Lets look at the life of Jesus:
Jesus was the most important person to ever walk this earth. He was Gods son, He was sent to save YOU, He came to earth to bring the message that He is the way, the truth and the light and the only way to get to God the Father, is through Him, the son. He who knew NO sin, became sin, FOR YOU. His purpose in this world was to save the world. 

Talk about important. 
Don't you think He was just a little busy too? 
Just saving the world and stuff. 

Guess what....

EVEN JESUS had to spend time alone with His Father. 


And early in the morning, while it was still dark, He arose and went out and departed to a lonely place, and was praying there. ( Mark 1:35) 

And immediately He made His disciples get into the boat and go ahead of Him to the other side to Bethsaida, while He Himself was sending the multitude away. And after bidding them farewell, he departed to the mountain to pray. ( Mark 6:45-46) 


But He Himself would often slip away to the wilderness and pray. ( Luke 5:16)
And it was at this time that He went off to the mountain to pray, and He spent the whole night in prayer to God. ( Luke 6:12)


And you think you don't have to?


Going to worship services, bible studies, having accountability partners
All of these things are so important, but they aren't where it stops.


To put it in perspective think of it like this-
If you are in a relationship with someone, it's great to spend time in a big group, all hanging out. You go to the movies with friends, out to dinner in a big group. It's all so fun. But there is still a part of you that needs alone time with them. To talk to them and get to know them even more. If you claimed to be in a relationship with them, but never wanted to be alone with them, what would they think?

Do you not think God wants the same thing? 
HE WANTS TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU.

Spending time alone with the Lord is important not only because He desires us to but because we NEED to....
It's how we find rest.
 "Come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest"
Matthew 11:28

 Most importantly it's how we stay connected to the holy spirit, and through that, is how we stay on guard to fight the good fight. 

"For it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of our Father speaking through you." Matthew 10:20 

This is why it is crucial that we understand, alone time with The Lord is only going to bring us good. You will see that those deadlines can still be met, the homework can still be done and the meetings can still be made. 

We can't let the everyday tasks of this world keep us from drawing closer to our savior

There is a battle at hand that we must be ready for. A battle that can only be fought by the Holy Spirit. A spirit that we have to be connected with, a spirit that we must draw near to so that He can use us. You are His vessel. Let Him pour into you so you can pour out to others.

Go to the well that will never run dry and see what He can do through you when you surrender to all He is.

Only by the blood of Jesus

I use a face wash called "purity" and for some unknown reason I decided to read the little saying about it on the bottle. It says this:

"You don't have to be perfect to be pure. Purity is intention. Be truthful with your words and actions. Keep your promises. Purity is perspective. Keep an open mind, and reserve judgement. Purity is principle. Treat others the way you want to be treated. No one is perfect, but we all can be pure. Purity is being your best self."

I'm not going to lie this literally made me cringe.

I even laughed to myself.

"Really? Who even would believe this" I thought. 

Then a sudden sadness swept across me. 

All of America, that's who. 

Those views that are so plainly written on my face wash, are the exact views seen today as "right". Just as long as you try your best. Like it says, "Purity is being your best self."

In all reality, what it's saying doesn't seem too bad. These principles that it says to have, aren't bad ones. Unfortunately, it's missing the key ingredient to have these things.


A theme it seems to invest in is you.
What YOU can do to fix it, how YOU should be pure by things YOU do.

 Purity is not something that is attainable by human hands. Nothing you do will ever be good enough to make you pure.  

You can live your whole life thinking you are doing good, being as pure as you can be. 
But let me tell you what your end result will be: 

Failure.

It might seem dramatic to you, and for that i'm sorry but here is the truth:

No matter how good you think you live your life, no matter how much you try and "fix" or "clean" your self, you will always fail.  

You are incapable of being pure apart from the Lord.


"And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ-to the glory and praise of God." Philippians 1:9-11 

How do we achieve pureness?

It is not something we can do on our own, but something that must COME THROUGH JESUS.


That is why He died on the cross. FOR YOU. So that we may be near God, because God can't be near sin. He had to do this because we weren't pure. 


"With the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot. He was foreknown before the foundation of the world but was made manifest in the last times for the sake OF YOU." I peter 1:19

On our own we will never be good enough. 


It doesn't take much to see that when you take Jesus out of the picture, "being pure" and "having good intentions" "keeping promises" and ect. becomes impossible. 

But the GOOD NEWS is that Jesus DID come down to earth to be the sacrifice we needed. We can be pure through Him.

I am grateful when I think about how my King saved me. He not only saved me by washing me clean with His blood, but He saved me from the expectations of this fleeting world. And for that, I will sing His praise. 

Wait no more

The phrase “good things come to those who wait” is a phrase we hear all too 
often. And if I'm being honest it's a phrase I've grown to dislike. 

It makes me feel like we are giving a mask to discontentment, and making it okay.  

What are we waiting on? 

We say it to people that are going through a hard time so that they have 
something to look forward to because “the good is coming”. In a way it’s like we 
are saying to them “it’s okay sulk in your sorrows now because good is coming to 
you”. 

What does that say about the blessings that The Lord IS blessing them with?  

What we seem to leave out is that “the good” they are searching for to 
satisfy them, will eventually cause the same heartache again. Because, what 
exactly is “the good”? 

The right job? The right guy? The right friends? 

All of these things will still leave us longing for more

Instead of “waiting” for good things to come we need to realize that we already have the 
one and only good thing we need. When we see that Jesus is the good, then we 
don’t have to wait anymore. We will see that He is enough.

The problem with “waiting for the good” is that we 
build it up in our minds, and we unleash the desires of our hearts to it. We 
then begin to think that our life will soon be perfect once the good arrives, 
but it never truly will.

God designed us to have a longing in our hearts, but his intention for that was not for us to long for the earthy 
things. He gave us that desire so that we could fall in love with Him.

So instead of feeling as if you are “waiting for the good” I encourage you to look 
at the apostle Paul, who found what it truly means to be joyful, and content in 
any circumstance. He did not do this by “waiting for the good to come” but 
understanding that he already had it.

“For I have learned in whatever situation 
I am to be content. I know how to be brought low and I know how to abound. In 
any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and 
hunger, abundance and
need. I can do all things through [in] Him who strengthens  me.”  

Stop waiting, and surrender to the good that is Jesus Christ. 

His blessings are new each day and He is the well that will never run dry.

If this waiting last forever, I'm afraid I might let go

How much do you truly trust God?

We have seen the sayings, “Let go and Let God.”

We can recite Jeremiah 29:11

We’ve been told all our lives that God has a plan

But do we really trust Him?

What if I was to tell you that God’s plan for your life didn’t involve marriage by the age of 23?

What if I was to tell you, it might not involve marriage at all.

Would you still trust Him? Would you still say He was good?

Now, please don’t get me wrong, I am saying this to myself just as much as I’m saying it to you.

But, I feel we, as Christians, are missing it.

We have single classes at church.

Older people, and married friends jump at the opportunity to fix you up with the new guy that is visiting.

I’m not saying this is wrong  

On the contrary, I think meeting people at church is a great place to do it.

But sometimes it is like they are trying to F I X it. Like singleness means you’re broken.

I was told recently that God would provide the right guy in my life; I just needed to learn to “Truly be satisfied in Him first.”

I’m sorry…what? I really couldn’t believe my ears.

..So what you’re telling me is I’m single because I’m not satisfied in the Lord?

THAT IS NOT TRUE. But more importantly it’s not biblical.  

What scares me the most is that girls really are believing this lie. They believe that they have to “fix” their relationship with God SO that the right guy can be provided. When in reality, that could not be more wrong. When we allow that idea to come into our head we will run into a serious problem. We no longer seek the Lord for the pureness of knowing Him; we will be seeking Him for His gifts.

So I’m going to ask a question that even makes me uncomfortable to think about,

Would you still love and seek The Lord, even if His plan for you didn’t involve a guy?

I think an even more important question to ask is; why is this question so scary? Our purpose on this earth isn’t to get married. Your life won’t begin when you meet “the one” and your life won’t stop if you don’t.

Now I’m not saying that I think just because you're 20 and single means you’re going to be single forever

        

         What I am saying is, don’t let your desire for an earthly relationship take the place of your eternal one.

We are not promised a husband, 2 kids, and a white picket fence. BUT WHAT WE ARE PROMISED IS SO MUCH GREATER.

Instead of worrying or fearing that we aren’t going to get those things, turn your eyes to what we have.  DON’T MISS IT.

You have a savior that LOVES you. Right now, he is reaching out for you. He promises to never leave or forsake you. His love never ends and at His right hand our pleasures forevermore. Trust in that promise.

The earthly desires of our heart are fading.

But our savior is pursing us right now. Go outside at sunset and look at the sky. Go out to the country in the pure darkness and get swept away by the beauty of the stars. Everything like that is Gods way of showing His love for us,

Don’t miss out on a relationship with the creator, while you are too consumed in a fleeting relationship with creation.

So was my purpose in writing this?

To hopefully make you see that without realizing it, we have made marriage an idol in our lives. Especially in the Christian bubble. We talk about being pursued, and how we can’t wait until we can have a Godly guy come into our lives. We daydream at church about the cute boy in front of us taking notes, or maybe we go to certain events because “good Christian boys will be there”

(don’t act like you aren’t guilty of this)

Like I said earlier, I am afraid we are missing it.

My fear is that the most of us will graduate college, guyless and Godless.

We will be tired of chasing after this idea that we are promised a guy. We will begin to harden our hearts to The Lord because we aren’t getting what we thing we deserve. We will let doubt sink into us and ultimately we will give up on The Lord because what’s the point.

So my prayer for every girl facing this road right now is that we will stop putting a guy at the end of our goals. That we will see that we CAN trust in His plan, no matter what that means. Don’t let todays view of singleness ruin your trust in The Lord.

“Let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith.” Hebrews 12:1

Please Remember that:

Singleness isn’t a disease

Nothing is wrong with you

You are worthy of Love

I promise you God is good no matter if you’re 20 and single or 40 and single.

You are the crown of creation. You are His bride. That will always be enough.