Giving Him my tomorrow

God tends to talk to us in ways and at times where we don't expect it. I am currently sitting at a table with my notes in front of me getting ready to take a test. While I am studying for that test I have my earphones in, nothing out of the ordinary, I like to have simple background music to drown out the outside noise. One of my favorite artists to listen to while I study is Shane & Shane. I have listened to all of their songs probably 100 times each, but for some reason today, their song "crucify Him" stuck out to me like it never had before. Here are some of their lyrics: 


I sing, "Hosanna!" when I want it all.
Then I crucify the Son of God.
Cause He isn't who I always thought.
Not what I want, but what I needed.
I sing, "How great and mighty is the King!"  
Just as long as He considers me
High above every other thing.
Even His glory.

It's packaged differently than Pharisees.
Wrapped in sing-a-longs and Christianese.
Empty hallelujahs to the King.
When my heart is loving idols.
A man of sorrows acquainted with grief,
He had no form; He had no majesty.
How could He have the audacity
To ask me to give Him my tomorrow?


 I think these lyrics are hitting me so hard today because I have come to the reality that this is exactly what I do to Jesus. 
Too many times than not, I put my own desires, my own plans and my own self before His glory. If I'm being completely honest, I do it ALL the time. It's a battle that I have within myself, to keep doing this. My heart longs to pursue Jesus and let Him have my life, but the moment it turns into something that makes me uncomfortable, I run for the hills. 

For some reason I forget the part that sometimes, things are going to hurt, and in that hurt we might not always understand why we are walking through it, but that shouldn't change our pursuit of Jesus. If anything it should make it stronger, knowing that He is the only one that can get us to the other side. 

So you can see my problem, I have a heart to follow Jesus but my human nature kicks in and sometimes my longing to have my own plan seems to overshadow my surrender to The King. Jesus is really sweet with his conviction, I am starting to see that why I have such a hard time surrendering, even when it brings Him glory is because I have turned my desires, plans and pursuits of my life into my idols.

My heart can't cling to Jesus when it is so heavily clung to these idols. 

In my head I know what is right, I know that surrendering my life to Jesus is what I am supposed to do, no matter the cost, because ultimately it will bring ME good and HIM glory 
(What a great deal right?!) 
When you read that you're probably thinking "why would I not want that?" 
I do, I so desperately do, but I have to get my heart along for the ride in order for this deal to go down. 

 If you are like me, and this is a problem in your life these are some things that I am finding make it easier to surrender...

You have to figure out what the idol (or idols) in your life is. This is not a fun process because it's an idol for a reason. You are going to have to ask Jesus to reveal this to you, and help you to release it to Him. I have found the most surrender comes when you are completely honest with the Lord. 
What I have learned with idols is that you can't just "place" them before Him, sometimes you have to ask him rip them from you.

In my personal life, I have seen that I have to be honest with Him in the fact that I don't want to surrender, some things are easier than others but ultimately it's scary, knowing that releasing things to Him doesn't come without a cost. Jesus has done a lot of ripping lately and my heart is beginning to see the beauty of it.

Right now Jesus is teaching me that while it is uncomfortable to release my life to Him, it's the only way I can know true freedom. He is showing me that He is a faithful father that loves me, because of this I know that while it may not be easy, it is more than worth it to give Him my tomorrow.